FBW: Sandra from Body Bliss Central (Ms. August)

FBW stands for Featured Blogger of the Week. Each week we will feature one of our calendar ladies or gentleman. Mondays will be a post written by the FBW and Wednesdays will be an interview of the FBW. If you want to know how you can be a part of the Blogger Body Calendar project, please click here.

Looking at the world around us, anyone could be forgiven for thinking that the most important thing we must do every day is put a lot of time, money and energy into looking ‘hot’ – or at least as hot as we can!

And many of us do do that. I used to do it myself, for years! I was so dedicated to measuring up to the Official Body that I chose to restrict my food often, spend a small fortune on diet books, programs and memberships of weight loss groups, make the harshest judgements about my self based on how closely I was following the diet plan, and I’m embarrassed to say, I hardly ever took my kids to the beach when they were little because I was so ashamed of my body.

I know, crazy.

I bet you have a little list of things you wish you hadn’t avoided doing because of the way your body looks, or that you will do one day when your body’s perfect.

Now, from the wise old age of 49 I look back at that young mother and I want to give her a good hard kick followed by a long warm hug, and tell her that it’s okay to not be perfect. To help her see herself with the loving eyes of her children. To help her hear what her body actually wants and needs, and trust herself to give that to her body, 20 years earlier than she did.

Sadly I can’t do that, but what I can do is what I’ve been doing for the last six years, and that is help as many women as I can to allow themselves to give themselves that approval, that love, and that freedom.

When I first found the Body Blogger Calendar I had just finished running the second series of The Body Image Revolution. One of the speakers, Claire Mysko, is a powerful body image activist who turned my belief about myself as a reporter of body image activism to one of being a body image activist. So it was with this new awareness that I came to the Body Blogger Calendar and I thought it was a blog. I decided to join in and add my voice to the project.

I was literally shocked when I realized I had to provide a picture of myself! Like so many women, I’ve always pointed the camera so I didn’t have to be in the picture!

My instant response was “I can’t do that!”. Next response: “Why can’t I?” And my answer was step up: it’s the final step of this learning path, and the first step onto a new path. I have no idea where it’s leading, but when I asked my photographer girlfriend if she’d help me out with photographs she joined me in a laugh fest at my foray into being a calendar girl. Believe me, this was not on my bucket list and it’s way outside of the old comfort zone!

Which is exactly where we all need to be if we’re serious about stopping the merchants from telling us how we are supposed to look so we will be happy and successful. I honestly believe that government regulation is a small part of this picture. Market forces, driven by consumers, make the greatest changes. We are those consumers, now, here.

For me, being a calendar girl is a weird kind of freedom, and trust me, if I can declare in this way that I am enough just the way I am, you can too. And then, what else is possible?

Sandy blogs at www.BodyBlissCentral.com, and is the founder and host of the international telesummit series, The Body Image Revolution, which helps thousands of women transform their relationships with their bodies. The series brings together the leading thinkers and activists in the field of improving body image, in conversation with women who want peace with their bodies.