FBW: Charlotte’s Picture of a Strong Woman

Please welcome back each of our calendar bloggers as they join us for another week as the featured blogger of the week (FBW). This time they are sharing stories of survival and photos of the strong women in their lives. If you want to know how you can be a part of the Blogger Body Calendar project, please click here.

When I found out about this assignment, my friend Nicole’s name immediately popped into my head. I just don’t think there’s anyone more deserving of a moment in the spotlight for all that she does. So, my dear: this one’s for you.

Nicole and I met many moons ago while we both worked for a children’s book publishing company. Our friendship developed to the tune of life’s ebb and flow. I remember the day her father passed away, visited her at the hospital when she gave birth to her beautiful daughter, and tried to get her out of the house whenever she needed a girl’s night out. She sent a basket to my family when my grandmother died, got me on my feet again when I ended things with my ex, and has been a rock whenever I needed an ear, a hug, a laugh, a lift, or a drink.

She is a remarkable friend to have.

In December 2007, Nicole gave birth to her second child: a baby boy by the name of Nicholas. Though I was on a cruise at the time, I was expecting the text to come in and was surprised when I heard from a mutual friend instead.

It wasn’t until I returned home a few days later that I learned that Nicholas was born with Down syndrome.

“I will never forget the moment the director of the NICU came to see us in Nicholas’ ‘room,’ pulled a wretched putrid-colored curtain around us (like that flimsy curtain could shield me from the horrifying news), and told us that ‘the third chromosome is present…your son has Down syndrome…I’m sorry.’ I let out a guttural scream and basically folded in half. My husband, ever the logical thinker, asked, ‘Will this affect his life span?’ The doctor answered simply, ‘Yes,’ but that single word was like a hot poker in my heart.”

That winter I watched her go through the various stages of guilt, grief, sadness, and heartache, unsure of how to respond. I needed her to know more than anything that I loved her and both of her children equally. Nicholas would always just be Nicholas to me: a beautiful, happy baby boy.

Over time, the grief melted. Acceptance took root in Nicole’s life. She devoted herself to fully research what she was up against and made the decision with her husband to get Nicholas the therapy he needed as soon as possible. She found a support group for mothers of children with Down syndrome, participated in walks to fund DS research, and she began to bring both of her children to social events once she realized how much her friends loved to interact with the oldest and newest addition to her family.

One day, not too long ago, Nicole sang her son’s praises over dinner and the various milestones he had achieved against all odds. It was music to my ears. She was so overwhelmed with emotion she had to choke back tears. And she told me that her son has taught her the most invaluable lessons in life.

“He may not fulfill all the dreams I had for him before he was born, but I know he will continue to meet his milestones and accomplish great things in his own time. He makes his parents and his big sister so proud on a continual basis.”

The love that Nicole has for her family is nothing short of extraordinary. And to have been given the chance to follow along on this journey is something I’ll never forget or ever take for granted. Thank you, Nicole, for inspiring me with your strength, compassion, and insight. I’m always proud of you, too.

Nicole and her Family

Charlotte blogs at My Pixie Blog, can be found on Facebook and chatting on Twitter @MyPixieBlog